Hypocrisy Today's Review

Reported from $ilicon Vally, CA

The hot new item now in Beta testing is Gang Warfare!

To judge from our sneak preview, this new arcade game will not only revolutionize the gamerooms in malls across the nation, it will change society as we know it.

Drawing from hi-resolution, hi-speed graphics and turbo-charged runtime, throw in some Virtual Reality plus Artificial Intelligence, this game simulates non-sensical gang and non-gang warfare. Its scenarios draw from current 6 o'clock news -- drive-bys, playground shootings, swat team over-reactions, serial killings, family massacres, lynchings, gang rapes... It even uses some of the by-stander videos we've all seen on the news. The blood looks real, the audio is earth-shattering, there even seems to be an olefactory output in some of the gorier sets. Platforms are provided for players under 4 feet tall.

It's an exciting and rewarding experience. We personnally racked up a 435 body count on our first try before we were ambushed by a random National Guardsman that is one of the game's little tricks to keep you alert.

So how will this new game affect societal behavior? If the upright citizens groups allow this game in the malls, its creators believe that it will provide a healthy yet safer outlet for violence, power, rage that is driving our young people of today. It should definitely cut down on the need for the real thing -- divert the little buggers from shooting up taxpaying citizens -- or, at the worst teach them the skills and reflexes to do it more efficiently. The game was originally developed as a simulation program under contract to the PLO for training terrorists, was resold to the IRA and various other private bloodthirsty groups that play at war. Watch for it at you local Mall and other family gathering places.

Next week, a review of the hot new educational computer game -- Junk Bond Scam. It's less action-oriented but an interesting and rewarding experience.